How To Improve Self Esteem: 6 Ways To Honor You!

how to improve self esteem

Many people struggle with self esteem.

The problem is that low self esteem impacts every area of life! Your relationship with yourself, others, partners, and your ability to be successful in your career.

Drawing from my own journey and experience as an executive coach, with a specialization in Industrial Psychology, I’ve distilled six effective ways to honor the self.

You’re here because you’re ready to elevate your level of self-esteem. You’re tired of feeling that way!

This article will focus you in the right areas of your life for: how to improve self esteem.

How to improve self esteem

  • Commit to finding your personal truth
  • No more self-rejection
  • Find people with higher self esteem
  • Get comfortable with your shadow side
  • Greater self-awareness of your weaknesses and strengths
  • Self-forgiveness
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Here are 6 ways to improve self-esteem…

1. Commit to finding your truth

Self-esteem is basically befriending yourself at a deep level.

Develop a close relationship with yourself.

You’ll find this article helpful for How to Find Yourself Again: 4 Soulful Steps.

Begin with committing to your true self. This first step is part of uncovering your truth and it takes a desire to know yourself better.

We’re all flawed… every last one of us.

So, you’re not alone.

To help you, here’s a 10 minute YouTube video I made on The 6 Ways to Be True to Yourself.

Also, here’s how to do a higher-self meditation practice to help you reconnect.

2. No more self-rejection

Most people I work with tend to be critical of themselves at the start of our work together.

However, we’re human, we have many feelings, and we have the ability to transform our lives.

We do better in life when we love ourselves… no matter what.

Nathaniel Branden is a self-esteem expert who wrote Honoring the Self: Self-Esteem and Personal Transformation.

If you struggle with self-esteem… get this book!

He’s found that people who don’t make progress in the problems that they’re having, and don’t seem to move on, and they don’t seem to solve them, at the heart of it, they’re self-rejecting.

Self-transformation cannot happen fully if we’re self-rejecting.

And so it is really important that as we’re looking at ourselves honestly, we do it with self-compassion, instead of rejecting ourselves.

We don’t grow from self-rejection.

Instead, we grow from a place of compassion and self-love, so our self-talk needs to be empowering.

Nathaniel Branden, how to improve self esteem,

3. Be around people with higher self esteem

Or at least not below your level of self-esteem.

I’m not saying, ditch your friends…

However, I am saying that we tend to learn habits from people spend time with. So, add to your friend group people who believe in themselves, like themselves, and have confidence.

Not the pretense of these things… but they are working on themselves and building themselves up in these areas.

You might be thinking… how will I attract people with higher self-esteem if mine is low?

Excellent question.

However, people like to be around people who are growing, working on being better in life, yet are willing to be real and authentic.

So, share your insecurities, but also share that you’re a work in progress and you enjoy other people who are as well.

That’s a more confident way to think.

How do you know who to trust?

It’s hard to know who you can trust because people become good at wearing masks.

According to Psyche Central, “A personality mask allows those who wear them to hide their real self from others. While masks can serve as a barrier of protection for your self-esteem and hurt, they can also lead to stress, depression, anxiety, and exhaustion.”

You can also talk with a trusted friend, therapist, religious or spiritual leader, mentor, etc., to help you feel good and express your feelings.

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4. Recognize your shadow side

Self-esteem involves embracing your shadow side.

Shadow is the part of ourselves that we hide from others.

The shadow are parts that we avoid looking at, but they’re following us everywhere we go. 

shadow, how to be honest with yourself

Shadow has two sides

Maybe it’s our laziness, our insecurity, our denial, our fear, how angry we are, or our jealousy. 

We all have this black bag that we carry around with our own set of shadow qualities.

Our shadow qualities are an important part of who we are because we learn from them.

We learn from our fear and our anger and our laziness, whatever it is, we notice it. We notice that it causes us pain, and then we learn from it. 

So if we ignore these parts to ourselves, then we’re ignoring a great opportunity to learn and to grow. 

Accept your shadow side

Even though it’s very popular on social media to say that we’re all flawed and imperfect and we accept it… it’s still hard to accept our shadow side.

According to, Your shadow is “the dark and emotional aspect of your psyche.”

As a life coach, I encourage my clients to enter into a state of self-forgiveness.

However, I have to ask myself:

Have I truly forgiven myself for things that I regret?

Let’s be honest, that’s a horse of a different color.

honest, life, take action, make you feel

5. Self awareness

This one hurts… but there’s not a person I’ve met that hasn’t done something they regret.

I’m guessing.

So, you’re in good company.

You can ask yourself, what low standards have I tolerated?

6. Self forgiveness

Self-forgiveness is a deep and personal process in building your relationship with yourself.

Medical intuitive Carolyn Myss, believes that self-forgiveness of things from our past heals us.

A good example is…. I said something on purpose that I know hurt someone’s feelings.

Now, I’m not the worst person in the world, but clearly, I may not be the nicest.

Can I forgive myself?

In my head, the quick answer is SURE! I had my reasons!

I’m afraid the honest answer is… I’m working on it.

Authenticity means bringing in all the many, complex sides of you.

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How to work on self forgiveness

Start being honest with yourself about what you haven’t forgiven yourself for.

And consider moving into a state of forgiveness towards yourself.

We feel it to heal it.

That’s the bottom line and it takes a lifetime. At least for me, it has so far…

Here’s a deeper dive into emotional release methods to help you feel and heal.

Choose techniques that resonate with you and meet you where you’re at in your life. Be honest with what you can and can’t do.

Be it tapping, crying, walking and crying, walking and breathing… whatever helps you feel and heal.

NOTE: With emotional release, do what you feel safe doing and see a professional if you can’t do it alone.

Self forgiveness audio

Here are affirmations to forgive yourself for past mistakes to help you on your path to self-forgiveness.

The short audio is spoken by me personally, and I understand the long road to self-forgiveness.

It’s a journey, so be patient with yourself.

honest, life, feeling,

Final thoughts

This article will hopefully help you with improve self esteem.

Seeing yourself with gentleness and compassion is at the heart of a better relationship with yourself and be your own best friend.

Follow the suggestions above so that you’ll grow a more loving relationship with you and begin feeling a strong sense of soulfulness.

The path to your own soul is paved with your ability to be compassionate with yourself in life… without self-rejection.

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