the soul

The Soul: The Beautiful Blueprint for Your Life

Sometimes things happen in life that force you to have a deeper relationship with the soul… and yourself.

This happened to me 14 years ago when sadly, my husband passed away.

This started a time of transformation for me, where I had to find myself again.

It was a time of depth, learning, and soulful retreat.

The soul is the deep place where you uncover the blueprint for your life. The blueprint is an outline of what is possible in your own life.

The Soul Holds the Blueprint.

The soul has the blueprint for your life. Much like building a home. It has the blueprint of what the home will be… if you choose to build it

This is free will.

So, whether or not you fulfill your soul’s destiny at any given moment is largely based on your choices.


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Care of the Soul by Thomas Moore.

A decade before my husband passed, a book by Thomas Moore called Care of the Soul came to me. Not a soul I knew had mentioned this book.

The book found me.

As a result, the soul and its connection to the world became my faith.

I fell in love with the idea of a unique soul… and obsessed with the commitment to love myself even though I was terribly flawed.

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Soul: The Place of Deep Knowing.

The soul is a place of deep knowing within you. It’s beautiful because life is very loud and busy.

So, to be able to go to a place of stillness, knowing, connection to source, connection to a higher power, to greater knowledge, is important for a soulful life.

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What is Being a Whole Person?

Being a whole person is allowing the good, bad, and ugly to each exist within you. Because the soul is not one-dimensional. It’s complex, layered, and beautiful.

So, even though you may say the wrong thing at the wrong time, it’s OK.

Being a whole person is allowing both ends and pieces to be present in your life.

If I allow myself to be whole, to have bad days, good days, bad moments, and good moments, then I can allow that in others as well.

Holding the space for us to just be, and to make mistakes is soulful.

The soul must be true.

The soul doesn’t care if we’re wrong or right. The soul just wants to know that we did it our way, says the incredible poet, David Whyte, in Poems of Self-Compassion.

The soul just wants to know if we did it our way. Our way.

Again, it’s not about wrong or right. It’s so tough as human beings because we always want to be right.

But, the soul is saying, Are you showing up authentically? Are you expressing who you are in your words, in your actions?

You express your soul in a way that acknowledges that we are all one soul. We are all connected.

The soul isn’t about getting your way… the soul doesn’t come from a place of pushing.

Instead, the soul comes from a place of truth.

The soul is respectful so that your soul isn’t pushing on other people’s soul space!

The soul in its purest form has this kind of generosity of spirit.


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However, the soul is messy.

Your soul is messy.

Things aren’t always going to fit so nicely. For example, what I want and what you want may conflict with each other.

On top of that, what you want may conflict with other things you want!

It’s a paradox sometimes. The soul doesn’t mind paradox, human beings do! A paradox is allowing for two seemingly conflicting things to both be true.

However, our minds are saying… Hold on! This doesn’t make sense.

While the soul is saying, These two things are happening and they’re seemingly contradictory, but I hold them both to be true.

But, the soul is able to go to that place of complexity, and it doesn’t make sense, and it’s messy, but who cares?

The soul is thinking… I’m here to learn.

Be comfortable with feelings.

Have you talked to someone who’s not very emotive and you ask them, how do you feel?

And they say, What are you talking about?

It’s like you’re speaking two different languages.

Feeling what is real for you is a muscle. So as you get more comfortable with emotions, you get closer to the soul.

Because you’re allowing yourself to figure out what is happening with you.

For example, if you’re afraid, ask what am I afraid of?

Am I afraid I’ll never reach my potential?

Or, am I afraid that somebody will tell me what to do and I hate that?

Your ability to just be with your feelings is like fresh air for the soul.

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Who you must be.

Self-discovery is beautiful. Not to be in analysis paralysis, but the pursuit of knowing yourself better is good for the soul.

You want to know what you need in this life. Not nice to have… but need to have.

Whenever you might feel like you’re not gonna live your dream, your life feels disappointing, right?

You feel way off.

So anything that’s happening in your life that feels disconnected from what you’ve dreamed, you want to yell to the heavens… That’s not what I’m seeing for my soul’s expression in this life!

I’m not seeing that at all!

Your soul’s expression in this life is to BE true to itself.

And then, know that the universe has your back.

Beware of the shadow, the parts you avoid.

There’s no doubt that I have a pretty optimistic disposition, that comes naturally to me.

But, what I did for so many years was ignore, cut off, unwilling to look at, and didn’t even like my anger, my fear, my anxiety, my disappointment.

All of that is the shadow.

The Shadow is the part you that you don’t want to deal with or admit exists! My life dramatically changed when I was willing to go there and feel my disappointment, grief, anxiety, and my anger.

That was the first one. I was very angry. And when I was willing to go there and feel it, it lightened me and opened me up, and made me feel so much better.

And of course, I was heartbroken.

So, I went into a Phoenix Process. Elizabeth Lesser, the author of Broken Open, defines it this way, “Our lives ask us to die and to be reborn every time we confront change—change within our self and change in our world.”

As I’ve said, finding myself and my destiny took years.

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The Butterfly Silhouette

I wrote The Butterfly Silhouette after my husband passed away. When I wrote that book, I was in a deep dark hole. I needed to be away from the light.

However, there was laughter in there too.

There were times with my sons when we were laughing, belling laughing. And we’re thinking… how can we be laughing right now? How is that possible?

But, during this time in the hole, I said, Forget you world, I don’t like this! I’m taking a break.

And that’s what I did. I lived in that hole for about two years. It was a time for my soul to rest, feel, and heal.

These were crawling times.

That’s what I call it in my course, Metamorphosis, where I teach 12 principles of metamorphosis to help people find themselves again after a loss of love, health, or dreams.

Final thoughts.

The soul is on earth to heal. So, our job is to show up for what we feel and be disciplined in our thinking.

To help you start each day, let your first thought of the morning be, I love you. Just throw it out to the universe.

It might be to God, to yourself, or it might be to whoever you’re thinking of at the moment.

But, let it be the first thought of the day.

And your last thought of the night.